From Mother to Matriarch: Lisa McGuire on Identity Evolution

In this episode, Lisa McGuire shares her journey through identity shifts, the importance of curiosity, and how AI is shaping the new human economy. She discusses how embracing change and authenticity can lead to a more fulfilling professional and personal life.

Topics

• Identity evolution and shifts in today’s world
• The role of curiosity and self-awareness
• Impact of AI on the human economy
• The importance of authenticity and vulnerability
• Strategies for navigating chaos and change

Chapters

00:00 Meet Lisa McGuire: The Strategic Identity Advisor
03:52 What's my operating system?
05:51 Identity Shifts: From Mother to Matriarch
06:46 A new landscape for business
12:32 The power of curiosity
15:46 Curiosity and Identity Evolution
16:33 What groups are reinventing identity?
19:47 The New Human Economy and Authentic Relationships

Keywords

identity shifts, authenticity, curiosity, new human economy, AI, personal growth, leadership, transformation

Guest Contact Details:
For more information about Lisa’s work, see https://lisamcguire.com 

Thanks to Jacopo Lazzaretti for the intro/outro music:  https://jacopolazzaretti.bandcamp.com/album/secret-love

For all contact details (including our Associates) and useful self-worth resources, see www.SelfWorthAcademy.com

Transcript

John Niland (00:00)
Welcome to Self-Worth in Times of Chaos. My guest today is Lisa McGuire. Lisa works with entrepreneurs, with executives on a host of business development issues. In fact, Lisa and I talked about this podcast a year before it actually came to life. Welcome, Lisa.

Lisa McGuire (00:18)
Well, thank you, John. That talk did start about a year ago, but we know how time is flying right now. But no, I'm really excited to speak with you today and see if I can be of service to your listeners.

John Niland (00:30)
Well, let's just extend the introduction a little bit first. what have I missed out on? where are you based, etcetera? Just tell us a little bit about where you are and the work you do.

Lisa McGuire (00:39)
Sure, I am based out of Atlanta, Georgia. I'm a strategic identity advisor. I help people who found success in one realm, but they feel like something else is calling them forward. So that's what I do. I created the category of only and help people learn who they are, how to show up, and what to say when they do.

John Niland (01:02)
this is gonna be such a great topic for today. a strategic identity advisor. What a great description. what's your own personal experience of this before we come to the strategic advisory bit?

Lisa McGuire (01:17)
Well, John, we could have a very long show talking about the several seasons of chaos in my own life. but what I really feel called to talk about now is, you know, just as recently as even two months ago, I had this chaotic situation where I was the way I was presenting myself, whether it was in a Zoom room, whether it was with clients, whether it was at a networking event.

Is I had a certain way I would approach a conversation. I would enter into the conversation. Now before I did, I would read the room. All right. So read the room. What is the tone of the room? What's going on here? I would determine what I needed to say and very protective and softening my voice to make sure I could stay in the room and still have a seat at the table.

Well, what I was seeing is I wasn't only doing it in person, I was also doing it even in my LinkedIn post, right? I would come in, I would present information, I would present a solution and tell everybody it was okay. And what I was doing, what I realized I was doing is I was being a mother figure to my clients, to the people in the room, to making sure everybody was okay.

And I would still be welcomed in that situation. Well, you know, being a mother and mothering people doesn't necessarily leave them sitting in the recognition that they have a problem that they need to solve. And so what I saw was I really wasn't a mother anymore. I have all this wisdom, I've got all of this evidence-based proof of how I've been able to help clients transform.

And I decided at that point I wasn't a mother. I was a matriarch. And so how I started speaking was more bold, more truth, more leaving people with, do you really want to do this? And here's the solution, and really kind of holding feet to the fire. And I have earned that. So that's that's one of my chaos moments that I've had was, my whole life I've been trained to be a mother.

I am also a mother of two children, but I don't need to mother people in my business any longer.

John Niland (03:48)
Brought about that realization.

Lisa McGuire (03:52)
What brought about that realization was I'm in the midst of writing my book. All right. And as I started writing my book, I was writing my book with a few personal stories. And then I would come in with all of this you know, content and justification and teaching. And my book mentor said to me, Tell me about how you wrote this chapter. And so I told him, and he said, I want more of your personal stories.

And I said, This book is not going to be about me. I'm not going to tell those stories. Well, it was a few days later, and I thought, why do I not want to tell those stories? And it helped me examine the reason why I didn't want to tell those stories was the story I was telling myself about what that situation meant. And it was

Entirely off base. I looked at it, I thought, this is ridiculous. I've been carrying this burden for so many years thinking it meant that. And it didn't mean that at all. So it was the time to pause, John, to examine and look at what is it that how what's my operating system running under? And is it actually true?

John Niland (05:17)
Hmm.

Lisa McGuire (05:18)
And

I would challenge people to to also do that. I think we run on just a cycle. We never take time to pause. We've got so many distractions. But at the end of the day, we get to choose.

John Niland (05:35)
Indeed. And it sounded like that was a very important moment of awareness for you as you were writing your book. Indeed, as you say that, I'm thinking writing a book is an identity exercise, isn't it?

Lisa McGuire (05:51)
It absolutely is. I thought I was writing the book, but the book in fact is writing me.

John Niland (05:58)
Wow. Beautifully put. Yeah. because, you know, writing a book confronts us with, you know, what is my point of view. I remember Ron Baker years ago, who had fabulous success with his books on pricing and managing professional firms. I remember Ron saying to me that I write so that I know what I'm thinking. What a wonderful description.

So coming back to coming back to identity, because this is very much an identity story, we've had a very significant you had a very significant shift from mother to matriarch. what other identity shifts have you been through?

Lisa McGuire (06:46)
Yes, I think the probably the biggest one is one that is I'm seeing widespread right now, John. I believe with you know, here we are recording in summer twenty twenty six, and how businesses are run now are even different than six months ago. the economy may be different, you know, we've got world events happening.

the marketplace is different, our customers are savvy, people may be holding on to their money a little bit more. And I'm running into so many people that the business they had that once lit them up

is now the business that they're questioning, should I even be doing this anymore? this started for me about three to four years ago. I had been a copywriter.

Customer centric copy, right? Then I moved to marketing strategy. And then as I was writing for consultants and coaches, I was very curious of what made them different. Well, they could not tell me. So then I backed up to personal branding. And as I got more into that, I started seeing personal branding as being a bit inauthentic, right? I saw it as what mask do I need to put on to perform.

To get you to take the action I want you to take. And so then I looked at that. I don't really want to be affiliated with performing. I want to be authentic. And so that's how I moved to identity. Well, people knew me as a copywriter. I'd won awards for copywriting. People knew me as a marketing strategist, a fractional CMO, and I still do some of that work. But

John Niland (08:17)
Hmm.

Lisa McGuire (08:41)
I was moving from that to what I really felt called I was I'd come here to do is help people understand and come back and reclaim themselves of who they really are and what they were here to do. So imagine people think you do copywriting and marketing and maybe personal branding and really you've got your foot in this other lane that's lighting you up. so this is what I'm seeing with a lot of people now.

The things that brought them success, they're almost seeing it like a prison because they feel like they can't break out of it and move into this new lane that they're already living in.

John Niland (09:24)
Yeah, yeah. Yes, it's one of these paradoxes that comes up time and time again, isn't it? Because other people recognize us for certain things, in your case, copywriting, marketing et al. And they want to keep us there because that's you know, that's the way we've been filed away in their brains.

Lisa McGuire (09:49)
Yes, and it's a lot of work to change that file drawer and put that card in another cabinet. Yes. But I I think, you know, someone said to me the other day, you're always learning, Lisa. And my feeling on it is, is I don't feel like I'm done yet, right? I feel like there's more to learn, there's more to grow. I know you share that as well, John, but I feel like that evolving is what continues to make us relevant. It's what connects us to

John Niland (09:53)
It is yeah.

Lisa McGuire (10:19)
People in, you know, I don't think age is a number that categorizes your relevancy. I think age or is a number that really identifies your potential for wisdom. And so as my number continues to climb, I need to find more of that wisdom.

John Niland (10:41)
Yeah, indeed. Indeed. So let's turn to wisdom and let's turn to the wisdom that you're bringing today, to the emerging economy that is, you know, emerging right in front of us, partly due to AI, but not only due to AI. There there are other forces. what work are you currently doing?

Lisa McGuire (11:07)
So I am doing that second lane of work right now, the strategic identity advising and helping people recognize that what they think is confusion is actually information and truth coming to them that they need to take note of. You know, they think they're confused, but a lot of times what we see is what I call the identity eclipse, John.

It's where you have one identity that you've held and you've got another one coming right behind it. And as they cross like an eclipse does, you know, which one do they hold? There's there's confusion in there. It's the messy middle. So helping people recognize where they are. I've got eight different steps that you follow as you do evolve in your identity. So helping people figure out where they are.

And understanding if it's identity evolution or you know, a lot of times people will think it's burnout and it's not actually that at all.

John Niland (12:13)
Hmm. Very interesting. We probably won't have time to go through all eight steps, but can you mention slight or let me ask the question slightly differently. what are the strengths that help people during that evolution or revolution as the case may be?

Lisa McGuire (12:18)
No.

So I think the strengths, the first thing is being willing to get curious. Okay? To get curious about what it is that brought you to where you are today. I think also acknowledging those as none of those are failures. They're information that brought you to where you are today, and being willing to

Acknowledge them, thank them, understand that's what got you here, but it's not where you're going. So almost having a memorial service or a grieving process to identify what am I taking with me and what am I leaving behind. And it doesn't mean that they're totally gone. I just kind of look at it as they're in the backseat, right? And I'm driving as they're watching me continue to evolve.

So I think one thing would be acknowledging what got you here. the second thing is looking at what is your future self? Where do you want to go? And being again curious to put yourself in situations where you can explore and see what you can find. you and I were talking before the recording about you heard someone speak and it

created this spark of an idea. And so I think this being curious is a great way to look at new ideas without being critical of yourself. I also have that feeling about how we learn about other people. You know, a lot of what we're told in the world is to separate ourselves from others who are not like us.

Or if someone thinks differently then they're wrong. But imagine, John, what the world would be like if we turned that into curiosity. So I would say curiosity is one, telling yourself the truth is the other, and the third one would be being willing to thank yourself for the the person that you are now.

John Niland (14:48)
Hmm. Yeah. That I love that idea of the memorial service to let go of or to grieve certain things. and I just had one today in the earlier part of today, I ran a webinar on pricing. And I have done webinars on pricing for so many years that it's you know, I have out-of-body experiences while delivering it. but I I just did a little walk after it along the seashore here and I promised myself.

As part of my memorial service, that this is the last time I'm gonna do that, you know, because I there are aspects of my work I want to let go of, even though it sometimes does not want to let go of me, to your earlier point of identity eclipse. You know, there are parts of the old identity that still look for their space in the in the light, if you like, even when even when we want to let go of them.

Lisa McGuire (15:34)
Yeah.

Well, and I think

the other part of it too is there's safety in the known, right? But when we can let go of it, it creates a space and margin for something new to come forward. So that's the exciting part.

John Niland (15:51)
yes, absolutely.

Yeah, yeah. But it is something I've noticed many times that they there is a pushback when when we try to let go of things. People, you know, want us to keep doing what we've been doing. It's an amazing recurring theme in in identity work. what groups of people do you see having the most identity eclipses right now?

Lisa McGuire (16:08)
Mm-hmm.

I think there's a couple of groups that I see really coming to the forefront. One are the people that are high performers, right?

they knew how to get to where they were, but you know, as we you know, I'm in the marketing world, and so I know even like last fall, two major players in the marketing world. One is a company, one is an individual. I would call him a marketing guru.

And both of them basically said the funnel is dead. All right. So when you think about a marketing funnel being dead, and what they said was coming forth was authentic relationships. Imagine that. When when those major players are making that statement, those high performers and everyone that follows them, the ground shifts, right? And so we're seeing a lot of people that

were highly successful, high performers. They knew they knew the formula to follow, right? They are a little bit discombobulated right now, or a lot, where the ground is shaky under their feet and they don't have the way forward. Now, what my philosophy on this is, John, what my my thought is, is the answer isn't out there. And that's where they're looking.

John Niland (17:57)
Mm.

Lisa McGuire (17:57)
The real

answer is inside. And I don't think it's an accident that some of the things that are happening in the world right now are to draw us back to ourselves. So that would be one group, I would say. the second group I'm seeing are individuals that are maybe around 35 to 40. All right. So what happened is they got to a point where they

Did everything they were supposed to do to find success, you know, go to school and get the job and the career, and they they know how to navigate all of that. Well, now they're looking up and saying, Is this all there is? So I'm seeing a lot of people questioning that. And the third one I see are the people who are at retirement age, or what we were told is retirement age. And I know you've seen that.

Quite as well, is I had a a talk with a gentleman yesterday. He is in transition from his corporate job. He's in his early 60s and he said, I know I should go back because what else would I do? Right? And that's the thing, is so many people who are at this stage have poured themselves into work. Some of them don't have hobbies.

They don't know what they would do with themselves. And we know that a lot of times when people do retire and have no purpose, then that opens a door for maybe an illness to come in. So those would be the three groups I would say.

John Niland (19:42)
Yeah.

Yeah, indeed. And we haven't even mentioned AI yet, have we?

Lisa McGuire (19:47)
No. Isn't

that refreshing we've got how far in the conversation without the mention of AI. Yeah.

John Niland (19:51)
Yeah, absolutely. We managed to get

in what twenty plus minutes and we haven't mentioned AI. Let's not even go there. I'm particularly interested in the this third group you've just mentioned, for many reasons, not least, that I'm right there myself, of course. I'm well past you know, my younger brother now has retired. So that really was like that was the that was a big

Lisa McGuire (20:11)
Yes.

Uh-huh.

John Niland (20:20)
mortality bell ringing when I heard that news. what do you see as your next chapter?

Lisa McGuire (20:22)
Yes.

Mm. My next chapter. I am so excited for my next chapter, John, because I feel like we are at the point right now where people are seeing that they do have a choice. it may not be the choices that they thought they were going to have, but what I'm seeing is people are understanding. And if I may use those two initials, AI,

AI is driving us to crave more authentic relationships. It's driving us to bring humanity back to life and to our businesses. So what I'm seeing is we're going to be creating, as Dr. Don Bardin was a gentleman on my podcast, he's a behavior economist, doctoral researcher.

He calls it the new human economy. So I see the new human economy coming where we can have relationships that move beyond the transaction into real, into developing trust, into creating transformation, into what can I do to help you? And as a result, we can build something beautiful together.

John Niland (21:53)
What a wonderful vision to bring us to a close today. Lisa, thanks ever so much for joining me. And what a great privilege it is to be alive at this transition point to the new human economy.

Lisa McGuire (22:09)
I agree, John. Thank you so much for having me. It's always a pleasure.